The interview started once we were all seated. Two young women crammed next to one another behind one desk in a weird power sharing, conjoined-twins type of way.
One of the heads asked, “Well, do you have any questions about the job?”
I checked my watch and confirmed that only one minute had passed since walking from the waiting room to the office that was separated from the rest of the cubicle farm by a few panes of glass. It wasn’t as though I was applying to an advertisement that said, Sign Painter Needed. The position was a little more complicated and the description was less than clear in explaining that travel was required but all work could be done from home.
“Actually, I do have some questions, but first, would you like a copy of my resume?”
They laughed in-sync as one might expect conjoined twins to do; sharing the same sense of humor seemed natural for these fledgling sisters-from-different-misters.
“Everything is online now,” the second head explained like she was talking to an old-timer instead of someone who had only been out of the work force for six months. “We have it all right here,” she tapped the side of her desktop computer, a trusted old companion.
Obviously, its online, that’s how you received my information. It’s a courtesy to offer, I grumbled silently to myself. Instead of calling her a moron, I remained diplomatic and offered, “Why don’t we begin with reviewing the basic needs of the job and then we can go from there.”
The gals looked at each other and nodded in agreement. Sounds reasonable, they telepathically said.
With the three of us in the closed office, the air quickly grew thick and stale. Why is there no air circulation in here? I wondered as I half listened to the two gloss over the travel and clerical duties as they shared a laugh about potentially spending five hours at a copy machine.
“Don’t worry, we supply the paper.”
When I realized that copy machine story was real, my interest seriously waned but they still twittered on like birds on a wire.
“That sums it up, any other questions?” the first head asked.
Aside from, where is the door, I only thought of getting home to my almond-eyed boy and not wasting another minute away.